Chapter Twenty-Two

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The Great Prank War

As of December 14th Harry and Gallatea were officially dating. They could hardly hide the fact, especially since they left the Forbidden Forest after the Care of Magical Creatures lesson holding hands. Their friends had been the first to pounce on them, asking a lot of questions and offering Harry congratulations on his daring rescue. The teacher told the pair she would be speaking to the founders about what had happened, glaring at a contrite Horatio as she said so. The rest of the lesson was declared a free period, and the seven friends headed up to the Gryffindor Room to discuss what had happened. As soon as the door closed, Hermione rounded on the Ravenclaws.

“ How could you do this?! Dating! It's impossible! Harry, I've told you before, we can't interfere too much in their lives. And Gallatea, you are a lady of distinguished lineage, you should not be destroying your family's honour by carrying on like this! It's just not done!”

“ Hermione, what are you on about? You can't think that…”

“ Ron, stay out of this. I don't think you get it. In our time it is perfectly acceptable to have a boyfriend or girlfriend in school. You can even go through a few partners before finding the one you want to spend the rest of your life with. But in this time, things like that just aren't done! People are betrothed to a person selected by their parents, especially when they are members of prominent noble families. If Gallatea and Harry get together, it will be a scandal!”

“ Hermione, shut up! I'm well aware of what is expected of me, and I accept the risks. Over the months you have been here I have grown to love Harry, and not just as a friend. On the first night I saw him I asked my mother for a betrothal, but she told me why that wasn't possible. Whoever I end up marrying, I know I won't feel for them half of what I feel for Harry. If he's leaving in a few short months, there is nothing I can do about it, but at least let us be happy while he is here.”

Harry and Hermione were sat in stunned silence, Harry because of what Gallatea had said, and Hermione because her point had been reasonably contradicted. Harry turned to his girlfriend for confirmation of what she had said, not believing his ears.

“ Did you say you loved me?”

Gallatea turned to the now distraught boy. He had started to shake, and she was getting worried. She turned to the others.

“ Could you guys give us a minute?”

The rest nodded and promptly left the room. The girl turned to Harry and grasped his hands.

“ Harry, I really do love you, and I'm sorry if that makes you uncomfortable…”

“ NO! It…it's not that at all. It's just; no one that I can remember has ever told me they loved me.”

Gallatea pulled the boy into her arms as the shaking subsided. He wrapped his arms around her as tight as he could before kissing her gently on the lips.

The following week saw the start of the Christmas holidays. Tuesday the 20th found Harry, Ron, Ardwick and Peeves in their corner of the library, plotting. Ardwick had called a meeting of the Marauders, having had a good idea. Peeves was positively bouncing in his seat in anticipation.

“ Thank you all for coming on such short notice,” Ardwick began, “ But I have had a most splendid idea. After today, we have precisely four days before Christmas day. Now, I know we have been considering pulling a spectacular prank on Christmas day, and I have come up with a…an interesting way of deciding how it is organised. I propose a prank war over the next four days, and the one to be the most successful will be allowed to plan the Big Prank on the 25th. What do you say?”

The other three boys looked mildly interested. Peeves asked the obvious questions.

“ How exactly would this prank war of yours work? And how would it be decided who won?”

“ Well, I've thought of all that. We will each place our names on parchment and mix them up. We will get an impartial body to choose the order. We will then each have one whole day to perform as many pranks as possible, which will be graded by the girls. On Saturday night, we will gather the final votes, and see who scored the highest. To make it fair, we won't tell the girls who is responsible for each day, just ask for a score. The one with the highest score gets to plan the Christmas prank.”

“ Well, I'm in.”

“ Good, let's get started…”

The 21st started with a bang. Literally. Once all of the students were sitting at breakfast, a loud crash was heard from above them, before tones of confetti fell from the sky. No-one escaped unscathed, but the ones who had hidden under the table were considerably better off. Those who weren't quick enough to hide regretted it, as the confetti left small round stains on people's skin, which wouldn't ware off for four hours. Classes that day were full of spotted students, much to the teachers' consternation. Lunch wasn't much better, as anyone who used pepper on their food was sneezing for the rest of the day. Even worse, anyone who used salt burped every time they tried to speak. It made for rather interesting yet noisy classes that afternoon.

Dinner, it had been agreed by the Marauders, would be the main pranks of the day. Wednesday saw anyone eating a meat product floating ten feet in the air. They then proceeded to tap dance, their feet flailing without purchase. The only ones spared were the Marauders and their friends, as they knew better than to try any food until they had seen from other people what did the damage.

Thursday morning found the Slytherins entering the Great Hall with heads covered in snakes. They looked like a group of gorgons, and even their gazes were turning students to stone. Statues were appearing all over the school, and they had soon learned not to look at anybody, especially after their own Head of House was turned to stone. The Ravenclaws turned up to lunch in a similar situation. They all had beaks and wings, making eating lunch extremely difficult. The Hufflepuffs and Gryffindors found the whole fiasco exceedingly funny, but it didn't last for long.

At dinner that night, the two previously unaffected Houses got their comeuppance. As soon as they sat down they felt like they were up on the ceiling. It was a similar sensation to what Harry had felt in the maze at the third task of the Triwizard Tournament. As soon as the spell took affect, both Houses started running around the room, screaming their heads off, yelling about being upside down. To the rest of the school, even those affected earlier in the day, the sight has rather hilarious. Eventually, once they had stopped laughing, the remaining three founders were able to reverse the effect. However, Slytherin was left as a statue until the next morning.

Everyone was dreading what would happen on the 23rd. By that time the whole school had heard that the infamous Marauders were having a prank war. Knowing they had at least two more days of tricks to come made the students a little more cautious. However, they were not cautious enough, as at breakfast dozens of them started turning into small yellow canaries. The House tables had been set with small plates of Canary Creams. At lunch even more people fell victim to bowls full of Ton Tongue Toffee. At the Ravenclaw table, Harry leant over to his girlfriend and whispered in her ear.

“ You would think they would have learned not to eat anything they don't recognise. I mean, I know some of the normal food has been charmed, but anything they've never seen before is just screaming `prank'.”

“ I know what you mean. Since I heard about this war of yours, I've made a point not to eat anything until I've seen you eat it.”

“ Wise move. Not that I always know what's coming, but the things that came out of my Mischief Making Kit I know to avoid.”

Dinner that night was rather amusing. This time, it wasn't the students that were the victims, but the teachers. They each stood up at the same time and started fighting each other with fake wands. Ravenclaw and Gryffindor were battling it out with wands that had turned into rubber chickens, and Slytherin and Hufflepuff were hitting each other with furry fake rabbits. The students just sat at their tables, dumbfounded. It was the second time that year that their teachers had humiliated themselves in front of the whole student body like that. They had vowed after the `Wizard of Oz incident', as it had been dubbed, that they would never let themselves be pranked again. Yet here they were, less than two months later, caught in a spectacle beyond their control. Once the initial shock had worn off, the students started laughing uproariously.

The last day of the competition dawned. The students were a little nervous about what to expect. There was only one Marauder left, and they didn't know who it was. What they did know, though, was that the last prankster had three days of pranks to beat, and having seen the competition could prepare himself accordingly.

The first sign of trouble came at breakfast. The students had learned not to trust any of the food, or their chairs, or indeed their tables. They all waited at the doors to the Great Hall for some brave soul to go in first and try the food. Eventually, Harry came down and walked over to his friends.

“ What's going on guys?” he asked them.

“ No-one's going in.”

“ They're all scared of what is going to happen.”

“ They think the whole room will have been cursed.”

“ They're waiting for someone to go and sit down first. Once they've seen what's safe and what isn't, they'll go in.”

“ Well, that's ridiculous! I'm starving, I'm going in.”

That said the Boy-Who-Lived strode into the Hall amid whispers from the other students. He sat down at the Ravenclaw table and lifted a little of everything onto his plate. As he lifted his fork to his mouth, the whole student body watched him carefully for any sign of a prank. He placed the food into his mouth and started to chew. The audience held their collective breath as he swallowed.

And nothing happened.

Everyone sighed in relief and started to head into the Hall. Sitting down they tucked into their breakfasts with gusto. They never noticed one boy wave his hand slightly.

Seconds later every student had turned into a bush. The Hufflepuffs and Slytherins were petunias, and the Gryffindors and Ravenclaws were lilies. It only lasted a few minutes, but it was long enough for some embarrassing photographs to be taken.

Lunch was approached with trepidation, but much to the students' relief, nothing happened. This lulled them into a false sense of security, as when they went to dinner that night they didn't take any care whatsoever. The culprit couldn't help but grin at the ease of it all. After the main course, when nothing had happened, everyone had relaxed. They thought their four day torment was over. However, as soon as they started to eat their deserts, they started to feel strange. Every student and teacher stood up, with the exception of the Marauders and their allies. Everyone else started to sway and sing, the students belting out the verses, and the teachers singing the refrain.

The teachers started, singing the first few lines and setting the tone for the song.

“It's a kind of magic

It's a kind of magic

The Ravenclaw table stood up and started swaying on the spot, singing:

“ One dream one soul one prize one goal

One golden glance of what should be.”

“ It's a kind of magic”

The Gryffindors took over from the teachers for their verse.

“ One shaft of light that shows the way

No mortal man can win this day.”

“ It's a kind of magic”

The Hufflepuffs actually got on their table for their lines.

“ The bell that rings inside your mind

Is challenging the doors of time.”

“ It's a kind of magic”

Slytherin House tangoed around the Great Hall singing:

“ The waiting seems eternity

The day will dawn of sanity

Is this a kind of magic.”

“ It's a kind of magic”

Ravenclaws, being the great thinkers they are, scratched their heads and did monkey impressions while singing:

“ There can be only one

This rage that lasts a thousand years

This flame that burns inside of me

I'm here in secret harmonies.”

“ It's a kind of magic.”

Snapping their fingers, the Gryffindors yelled:

“ The bell that rings inside your mind

Is challenging the doors of time”

“ It's a kind of magic

It's a kind of magic.”

The Hufflepuffs decided to make their last verse a little different, so they sang it opera-style.

“ The rage that lasts a thousand years

Will soon be will soon be

This is a kind of magic

There can be only one

This rage that lasts a thousand years

Will soon be done-done.”

The Slytherins, not to be outdone, clapped their hands, flamenco danced on their table, and sang the last verse gospel-style.

“ Magic - it's a kind of magic

It's a kind of magic

Magic magic magic magic

It's a kind of magic.”

As soon as the song ended, the entire school population glared at the eight hysterical students, who had to flee the Hall quickly to avoid being maimed.

The students found refuge in the Gryffindor Room. Peeves had been told about it by Ron, as it was the perfect place to plan pranks away from prying ears. They were still laughing hysterically as they collapsed into comfortable armchairs around the fire. Once they had recovered somewhat, Harry turned to Ginny.

“ Please tell me you got that on camera.”

“ Of course I did! I have the last four days on film, I didn't miss a single event.”

“ Good, because we're going to have to show the pictures to Fred `n' George when we get back. Sirius and Remus too. I bet they'd enjoy them.”

“ You will give us copies, won't you?” Ardwick asked. Ginny just turned to him and nodded.

It was Peeves, looking confused, that asked the obvious question.

“ What do you mean, `when you get back'?”

The four time travellers looked at each other in alarm. They'd slipped up. They had forgotten that Peeves didn't know where they were from. Nodding to each other, Hermione turned to the future poltergeist.

“ Peeves, what we're about to tell you can't go any further…”